You Head to the Gym...I Head to the Couch

Wait A Minute...What?

noreply@blogger.com (prgvt) — Sun, 22 Nov 2009 17:52:00 +0000

I ride my bike with a toothpick in my mouth. I commute on my bike 3-4, or more, times per week, and I pass a family waiting for the school bus with their kids. Turns out that this family is the aunt and uncle of a student of mine at the high school where I teach. This student tells me that her aunt and uncle call me “the toothpick guy”.

I go cross-country skiing with a toothpick in my mouth. When I first moved to Vermont, I became a member of the Camel’s Hump X-country ski center and skied there frequently before I went to work at 3. Since I was a regular skier, I got to know Dave, who owned the land and ran the ski center. The ski area closed, but years later re-opened as a cooperative. For memories, I went back to ski the trails, and deep into the woods, ran into Dave. “Still got that toothpick, I see” he said.

In early spring this year, our group of active friends were planning or first bike polo game of the year. Since I had arranged the outing, I decided to stop at the local grocery store to pick up some post-game beers. I was dressed in my bike gear and, yes had a toothpick in my mouth.
As I was in line waiting to pay, 2 women walked into the store and then immediately got in line behind me. One of the woman looked at me and said sternly, “Take that thing out of your mouth, it’s not a good look for you.” “Yes ma’am,” I replied sheepishly, going along with the joke. “What does your girlfriend, er, wife think?” she shot back, looking at my ring finger.

I began to explain how I was known as “the toothpick guy” and how everybody knew that the toothpick was a part of my activities, but figured the stories were too long and wouldn’t make a point to this lady. The other woman chimed in, “Do you ride your bike with it in your mouth? Isn’t that dangerous?” Again, I started to make a point that I try not to fall on my face when riding, and after a few minutes, the toothpick is relatively harmless because it is so mushy, but stopped again…their mock scolding joke was wearing thin…because they weren’t playing along.

As I was gathering my change and my beer from the cashier, the second woman asked the first something like, “What kind?” Then the first woman said to the cashier, “A pack of Parliament 100’s please.” I turned to them and said, “Your giving me shit about a toothpick in my mouth and you’re buying smokes?”…and, as I was walking away. “Good luck with that.”

Man, I figured I would have at least waited until I had left before asking for the smokes.

Sheesh.

'Cause We're Going To High School, Rah-Rah-Rah!

noreply@blogger.com (prgvt) — Sat, 21 Nov 2009 00:00:00 +0000

I've decided to collect random quotes I hear in my classroom or in the halls at the high school where I teach. Keep checking for I will be adding more as the year's progress.

"What's your thing?"

"There's SO many penises around the school...I see at least one a day."

"And the thing in my thingy is poking me here and it hurts."

"You made my zipper scratch my tummy."

"I'm not a good photographer, I just want to graduate."

"I'm not gay...just a cheerleader."

"If you lick someone's elbow without them noticing, they won't feel it."

"How do you guys get your feet to not smell like funk."

"If I was good at Photoshop, and could make you look skinnier, I would.

"I have growing pains and I'm suppose to be done growing."

"You know, I just realized I'm wearing the same pants as I did yesterday."

"They're talking...it's language for them...it's burping language."

"Awwww...I wish my name was Philip."

"It's better to get a straight 'F' than a randomized 'C'."

I've had the same cell phone since I dropped it in the toilet."

"He used to be rich...then he married my mom."

"I hate when people chew with their mouth open and talk with their mouth open."

"Look at my brain. It's tiny."

" So if I'm sleeping, I can keep one eye open and the other closed."

"Where are you going?" "Nowhere. I thought we were going somewhere."

"I only tell on people I don't like."

"Dude, I miss the smell of this room."

"I thought I had a worm in my leg." Why? "Because everybody told me I had one. I had my mom take me to the doctor and he asked me if I was under the influence of anything."

"I think I figured out something but I don't know how it works."

"My pants are in the ceiling....a large piece of my pants."

"I wanted to get chocolate but I got nuts."

"Keep walkin' little miss mini-skirt with the ass hangin' out.

"Look what I never told you."

"Wouldn't you rather have dirty hair than a dirty thirty-dollar sweater?"

“I’m a mutt. A. and I are both mutts because we’re not white.”

“If I have to cry, I’ll walk into the boy’s bathroom and cry like a man.”

"You mean he told you that the reason he wanted to go out with you was because you had a big rack?"

"My throat is all stupid."

"It all started because I lit J. on fire."

The Forecast Calls For . . .

noreply@blogger.com (prgvt) — Thu, 30 Jul 2009 16:21:00 +0000

I always wanted to be a weatherman when I was little. I used to watch Harry Volkman on Chicago's Channel 2 News religiously. I was fascinated by the weather then and now. Oh man, am I ready for my 60’s? Weather Channel junkie, here I come. Anyhoo, I kind of pride myself on being able to read radar and weather maps. This is especially important as a bicycle commuter...and, anyone who lives in Vermont knows how challenging the weather has been this summer for outdoor activities. We’ve has a lot of rain: 5 1/4 inches in June and over 4 inches in July. There have been some lousy rainy days, but most of the precipitation has fallen via the afternoon, pop-up thunderstorms. So for cyclists, it’s been hard to find time to ride…especially the 9-5ers. Being a teacher, with 8 weeks off in the summer, and even with all the rain, I still have had the opportunity to ride often…as long as I can accurately use my weather predicting skills properly.

July 7th, after a bout of rain-rain-rain in late June, and some ‘little’ rides in between, I was itching for something more challenging. I hadn’t climbed the App Gap in a while. It was a cool day and my ‘expert’ interpretation of the future radar for the day seemed to give me a window to ride until around 2. The ride is 40-50 miles, depending on which route I decided to ride, and about 3400 feet of climbing. I figured no more than 3 1/2 hours. I left at 10…I should have plenty of time.

(click here for map)

Perfect temperature for riding, a little drizzle, but the clouds to the west didn’t look any more threatening than just drizzle. I pushed on. I got a good dose of light rain near the end of Main Road, thought about turning back, but again after looking west, made the decision to climb.

About halfway up the climb, I heard a “hiss-hiss” sound as I stood up on the pedals. I looked down at my rear tire, thinking flat, but didn’t see the tire losing air. I rode on. Near the top, at the REALLY steep section, the rear tire now was getting squishy and it obviously had lost some air. I decided to “hump” it up to the rest of the climb and change the tube at the top. In the parking area at the top, there was only one other person, a woman who had driven up and was pausing for a smoke. She mentioned something like, “it’ll be easier going down,” then drove off.

I pulled off my wheel and tire and was getting ready to install the new tube when I looked down the valley and noticed a wall of rain heading my way…a major wall of rain. I had read the radar wrong.

(click here for the radar loop for July 7th)

Well, anyone who has ever climbed “the Gap” knows that there is no to hide…the only structure is a microwave tower. I grabbed my stuff and hightailed it over to the tower to see if there was anywhere I could find to get out or the rain. The door to the tower had a 4-foot square protective overhang…I took shelter there.

Just as I got underneath, the rain rolled in, increasing it’s intensity every minute or so. I decided to work on the wheel while I waited out the storm. The rain came down harder and the wind picked up as well. I was semi-protected now…and as I was seating the last bit of tire onto the rim, I noticed that the tire was trashed…the outer casing had split and was peeling back. Perhaps it was rideable, but not safe, especially down the Gap road. It was now absolutely pouring…then lighting…with instantaneous thunder. The storm was right on top of the mountain, and there I was, under the tallest structure around.

Now I started to worry. What if lighting strikes this tower? Is it grounded? Grounded where? Inside, or outside of the building? Am I going to be toast? More rain, more wind, darker skies, more lightning and thunder…more freakin’ out. I was trying to figure out a way to get out from under the tower. A few cars passed, but it was raining so hard and I was hidden...there was no way they could hear or see me…and I wasn’t about to go out there. I put down the wheel and crouched by my bike, trying to control my breath. I knew that this was a fast moving storm and it would be over soon… I just had to wait it out.

The rain finally slowed down. I walked to the parking area and began to think of whom to call to help me out. Cell coverage was sketchy, but I got through to my buddy Rich. I explained my situation and then lost reception. A couple of cars came up the road and the passengers got out. One guy asked me if I was all right and I told him, “kind of,” and hoped that Rich had initiated the rescue plan. It started raining again, I was cold and starting to shiver, so I headed toward the tower.

I still wasn’t getting cell reception…but I could hear my voicemail -a message from Rich saying he couldn’t come get me and that we needed to make a plan and to call him back. I got through to Rich again and he said he was going to call another friend, Amiee, who lives nearby to see if she could scoop me. I had her number so I told him I’d call and call him back. Again I lost coverage. The rain stopped. I walked around the parking area trying to find a zone.

A couple of UVM college kids in a truck drove up to me and asked me if I knew where the trail to Camel’s Hump was. I said, “I can show you EXACTLY where it is,” and went on to explain my predicament. They were planning on hiking up for an overnighter and appreciated my offer. I put my bike in the back of the truck and jumped in…saved.

Unfortunately cell coverage along the Main Road in Huntington sucks and I didn’t get through to Rich until the guys had dropped me off at a store south of Hinesburg. Rich called 3 people and finally got through to Catherine who lived just down the road from the Gap...she volunteered to try to rescue me. However, we couldn’t reach her to cancel…she had already left.

I decided to try and put air in the tire and limp the 5 miles back home. The sun was out and I was happy to be within reach of my house. I made it back without a flat and immediately left a message for Catherine to thank her for her kindness. I wound up talking to her later and she said she had driven up, and when she didn’t see me, drove down to Mad River just in case I had gone there (it was my one of the options I thought of when I was huddled under the tower). No worries…glad to help…and to know how friends come through when needed.

Funny, when I tell this story to people, I mention how crazy those UVM students were to think about climbing Camel’s Hump to spend the night…especially with all the thunderstorms forecasted.

mmmmmm, bacon, pancakes & syrup

noreply@blogger.com (prgvt) — Mon, 30 Mar 2009 00:47:00 +0000

Fun at Dakin Farms

Pinhole Photos

noreply@blogger.com (prgvt) — Tue, 10 Mar 2009 02:33:00 +0000

Click HERE to go to a new gallery of some of my favorite pinhole photos.

Thanks for your support.

What I'll Miss Once it Gets Warmer...

noreply@blogger.com (prgvt) — Mon, 02 Mar 2009 13:48:00 +0000

Ann and I found this really sweet piece of ice for skating. The recent melt/rain/freeze has created skating rinks in the middle of pastures and fields. At this spot, we could have skated back into the woods that you see in the background.

Skating on Glass

It Must Be Jelly, 'Cause Wine Don't Shake Like That.

noreply@blogger.com (prgvt) — Sat, 25 Oct 2008 21:14:00 +0000

We went over to our neighbor Ray's place today and picked a buttload of concord grapes.

Hmmmm, wine or jelly?
Ray makes wine, his cherry wine packs a punch and isn't too sweet, but I'm not a big fan of sweet grape wine...and I've never made it before. So, jelly it is, which I have made with Maysel long ago. We washed, mashed, cook and strained the buckets full.

Stained fingers and a few hours work later, we have 8+ quarts of juice.
Tune in later to see how many jars of jelly we get.

We Have A New Pet!!!!

noreply@blogger.com (prgvt) — Sat, 25 Oct 2008 21:00:00 +0000

A Lizard!!!

Bisy is getting old...his daily routine has been reduced to begging for food...then finding the warmest place to sleep...a periodic chase of the laser pointer, or a run around the yard like a crazy cat...then it starts all over again.

How Much?

noreply@blogger.com (prgvt) — Wed, 22 Oct 2008 01:26:00 +0000

Bike Commuting = Good

You know this to be true, but check this out...my last 3 petrol receipts:
(click on the image to see it larger)

That's around $40 per month...with fill-ups only ONCE per month.
Worth a try?

Check out my daily commuting log:
http://www.mycyclinglog.com/profile/prgvt

Before and After

noreply@blogger.com (prgvt) — Sat, 04 Oct 2008 20:56:00 +0000

Harvest Time
We had a wonderful bounty

Here's one example...from start to finish.

Check Out These Melons

noreply@blogger.com (prgvt) — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 13:32:00 +0000

We'll tap into our first EVER mini watermelon this weekend.
We've already eaten one of these heavenly canteloupe...and there's at least another dozen more out there.

The Fart Party

noreply@blogger.com (prgvt) — Mon, 18 Aug 2008 19:09:00 +0000

You have to go to this site:

http://www.fartparty.org/

...and you have to buy the book!

Neighbor Ray Calls Them "B'tatas"

noreply@blogger.com (prgvt) — Mon, 18 Aug 2008 19:05:00 +0000

Dug up our first EVER home-grown potatoes today!!!

Our neighbor Ray gave us some potato starts to plant this year. He plants 5 HUGE rows in his garden (mini farm) because he likes his "b'tatas with butter". We planted one row. The first plant we dug up relinquished the pile above...there's at least a dozen more plants left.

French fries anyone?

The Best Day of This Summer

noreply@blogger.com (prgvt) — Thu, 07 Aug 2008 02:30:00 +0000

08_01_08
Janda and Galiga

It's Pickling Time!

noreply@blogger.com (prgvt) — Wed, 16 Jul 2008 13:10:00 +0000

Looks like this year's cuke crop might be stellar...

even with the initial battle with cucumber beetles.

5 A Day

noreply@blogger.com (prgvt) — Tue, 15 Jul 2008 13:56:00 +0000

What a berry season!!!

Kind of hard to NOT get your 5 servings of fruit per day with this kind of output everyday.

Slice o' 'za

noreply@blogger.com (prgvt) — Sun, 03 Feb 2008 15:21:00 +0000

Sunday is usually 'pizza night' in our house, but since tonight we'll be watching the Super Bowl at a friend's house we won't be making/eating. Each time I mention this tradition to people, the same question pops up, "What do you use for dough?" Well, my pie-loving friends, I found an extremely easy...and good...dough recipe a while back and now use it religiously (get it? religiously...pizza on Sunday nights?). Here it is:

1 package bread yeast (almost a tablespoon)
1 teaspoon sugar
1 cup HOT water
Mix these 3 ingredients in a bowl whisk to dissolve the yeast and sugar..cover and let stand for 10 minutes...then add:
1 teaspoon salt
2 tablespoons olive oil
2-1/2 cups flour
Stir or beat (I use the kneading attachments for my hand mixer) until combined...cover and let sit for 5 minutes...put some olive oil on your hands grab the dough and knead the dough on a floured surface until smooth...roll out dough to fit your stone or pan.

Note: this dough works well for flat or deep dish/stuffed pies. You can also let the dough rise a couple of times before you shape it. Of course this dough can be made ahead of time and be frozen, but in the time it takes to thaw out you can make it.

Junk Mail

noreply@blogger.com (prgvt) — Sun, 20 Jan 2008 16:58:00 +0000

I used to watch 60 Minutes more than I do now. I still like some of their investigative reporting, but it's not like it used to be. They add their "spin" just like the Evangelical Christians, Michael Moore, and all politicians...and, I miss Ed Bradley and Dan Rather's craziness. Throughout, I've never been a big fan of Andy Rooney. Although he's funny and relevant sometimes, his whiny complaining gets to me, but there was one segment where I agreed with him.

His segment was about the large amount of junk mail he receives, and even though there are services available to help reduce the amount of junk mail we receive, some still filters through. So, his plan of attack was to use the pre-paid envelope to send back all the surveys, credit card applications, and pleas for money, that we all get in our mail. These companies get charged for the postage, and processing the envelopes must create some sort of inconvenience. This inconvenience is Rooney's justification...as these junk mailers inconvenience us, we must in turn, inconvenience them. Love it...and I do it from time to time, especially with credit card offers.

Knowing that magazines and on-line stores sell their databases, I'm always trying to figure out which magazine/store (or gift received) was responsible for some of the junk mail I get....or that schmaltzy Williams-Sonoma or Lillian Vernon catalog. I've even started to use different versions of my name when ordering on-line to see how the six-degrees of separation works. However, to send junk mail back to where it came from means using the pre-paid envelope, which requires opening junk mail, another time-consuming process, but sometimes quite humorous as well.

Recently Ann and I received a envelope addressed to the "Main Grocery Shopper in the Household". I opened it out of curiosity and looked at the survey. I've included 2 of the survey questions...the one above is unanswerable for us, and the other is just plain funny...mmm, creaming.

Book Quotes

noreply@blogger.com (prgvt) — Fri, 14 Sep 2007 00:00:00 +0000

Here are some of my favorite passages from books I have read:

"I came home, and the only things people were interested in were things just beyond my comprehension. Who cared about Jennifer Lopez? How was it that I was watching CNN one morning and there was a story about freaking ducks being fished out of a sewer drain–while the story of soldiers getting killed in Iraq got relegated to this little banner across the bottom of the screen? Ducklings getting pulled out of a sewer. How was this important to our country?
I was not understanding what was going on. I was not grasping anything.
How was i willing to go and die for these f--king people who wear sweatshirts with little kittens on them? Or these people with sequins who bump into me with their carts at the supermarket and then look at me like I'm an asshole?
It's a very strange country we live in."

Kayla Williams, Love My Rifle More Than You - Young and Female in the U.S. Army

"Phil wiped his plate mournfully, while I toyed with a crust of bread, overcome with the sort of plummeting despair you feel when you're driving coast to coast and suddenly realize, in the dead of the night, that you've been going in the wrong direction for the past three hours, the oil light is flashing, you're nearly out of gas, and your dog is not curled comfortably asleep in the back seat as you'd supposed but abandoned along the strip of crapped-over grass at the last truck stop."

T. Coraghessan Boyle, Budding Prospects

"Picture, if you will, a boy of nineteen, still slumbering in the limbo of adolescence, having heard nothing but revolutionary blather about patriotism, Communism, ideology and propaganda all his life, falling headlong into a story of awakening desire, passion, impulsive action, love, of all the subjects that had, untill then, been hidden from me."

Dai Sijie, Balzac and the Little Chinese Seamstress

"The way to shop when you have a limit on money and you don't want to be bothered every morning picking out and matching up items in your wardrobe is to buy everything alike."

Kaye Gibbons, Ellen Foster

"Yet the resilience of trees is something I have always counted on. It supports a certain confidence that life will go on, noticed, or unnoticed."

Stephanie Kaza, The Attentive Heart

"You’ve got to pick at it, keep it alive and in turmoil, you’ve got to pick at it and unravel it until it all comes apart and you’re compelled to start all over again. Maybe we all live life at too high a pitch, those of us who absorb emotional things all day, and as a consequence we can never feel merely content: we have to be unhappy, or ecstatically, head-over-heels happy, and those states are different to achieve within a stable, solid relationship."

Nick Hornby, High Fidelity.

"We sat there. I wanted to say something to cheer her up. I had a feeling that cheering her up might be a lot of work. I was thinking of how sometimes, trying to say the right thing to people, it’s like some kind of brain surgery, and you have to tweak exactly the right part of the lobe. Except with talking, it’s more like brain surgery with old, rusted skewers and things, maybe like those things you use to eat lobster, but brown. And you have to get exactly the right place, and you’re touching around in the brain, but the patient, she keeps jumping and saying, 'Ow'.”

M.T. Anderson, Feed

Seeds, Dirt and Love (part 2)

noreply@blogger.com (prgvt) — Tue, 24 Jul 2007 18:19:00 +0000

We picked our first ripe tomato today...yippee! Along with a bunch of green beans, we can now add this fruit to the lettuce, spinach, mesclun, braising mix, kale, saucer squash, cilantro, dill, cucumber, and onion we've enjoyed so far.

I swear the cabbage, cantaloupe, cha-cha squash, peppers and pumpkin are getting bigger by the minute. Here are some more photos...tiny pepper and pumpkin.

We've got flowers too.
Check out this hibiscus blossom:

Blackberries...arg, what to do?
Mmmmm, upside-down cake.

And why is our garden so successful?

Bisy....on guard.

Seeds, Dirt and Love (part 1)

noreply@blogger.com (prgvt) — Mon, 16 Jul 2007 13:19:00 +0000

Holy Summer! Our garden is kickin'! We've had our share of the leafy stuff (lettuce, spinach, mesclun, kale), enjoyed the basil, dill and cilantro, and had a few flying saucer squashes (yummy!). We are now waiting for our 20 tomato plants (each with at least 10 tomatoes attached) to start ripening. We'll be up to our necks in 'maters and will be 'putting up' pint-fulls of sauce, salsa and ketchup.

Yes, it wouldn't be a Galiga garden without cucumbers...for pickling...but the vines are being a bit sluggish right now. Perhaps they'll catch up with the cantaloupes, pumpkins and cha-cha squashes (see photo) that are sending their vines all over.

More photos.

'maters, squash flower and onions...

lettuce, mesclun, flying saucer squash...

and let us not forget Ted and Carol's beautiful berries...

Come and get it! More later....

If I Had a Vanity Plate?: JETSTRM

noreply@blogger.com (prgvt) — Wed, 14 Feb 2007 18:06:00 +0000

Okay...Finally...after 12 years, I bought a new car. I sold my 1995 Honda Civic hatchback (nicknamed "the munchkin" by Carl) with 160K miles on it, and still getting 40 miles/gallon, to a mellow dude in Burlington. I splurged a bit on the new ride, a 2004 Honda Civic Si. It was more then I wanted to spend. But there was less then 10K miles on it, had all the bells and whistles (AC, CD player, sunroof, power everything), and it is F-A-S-T.

I love it. It moves. Soon, the jokes started flying from my friends,I think as a result of envy after they got a ride in it, or drove it. My old housemate commented, "Worn out the tires yet? Doing the slide?" and another friend said, "No, I couldn't own that car...it'd get me into trouble."

I was driving to see Ann. She lives in Winooski. After the exit off of I-89, the speed limit immediately drops to 25 m.p.h. My last speeding ticket in the past 20 years was issued by one of Winooski's finest. Winooski is going through a revitalization. They've added some big buildings and a rotary.

I was cruising into the downtown section when I noticed a policeman along side the road. He did one of those 'point and pull over motions'. However, I wasn't EXACTLY sure he was pointing at me. I continued on, glancing at my speedometer (40 m.p.h.), and in my rear view mirror (nothing...except a bedding truck), as I passed him. The policeman ran to his car. Hmmmm, maybe he was pointing at me.

I didn't slow down and entered the rotary without having to pause. Ann's street shoots off of the lower part of the rotary. The street is narrow, with businesses on either side, then widens as it passes parking lots and two large apartment/condo projects near the river. As I turned onto her street, I saw the cruiser, lights flashing, about to enter rotary. Once past the first stop sign, I sped up.

Ann lives in the smaller building a half mile from the rotary. The parking lot for her building is well-hidden down a short hill. After driving a quarter mile, I looked in my rear view mirror again. The cop car had not yet made it to her street, possibly getting hung up by rotary traffic. I floored it, deftly swung down the hill, into a parking spot and quickly hopped out of my car. No cop car. I walked swiftly to the entrance to the condo, not noticing Ann who had pulled into her parking spot minutes before me. "What's going on?" she questioned. She wondered why I was walking (swiftly) right past her car. I was on an escape mission. Safely inside, I told her the story.

I'm on the lamb, but I ain't no sheep.

China Part 4

noreply@blogger.com (prgvt) — Thu, 17 Aug 2006 22:10:00 +0000

We're soon off to Inner Mongolia, but before our flight we had time to kill, so we went to the market and got immersed in all the morning activities. Again, nothing quite like this in the U.S. There were beautiful vegetables, bags of spices, raw and cooked meat stalls, huge winter melons 3 feet long, and piles of fruits. Live animals —eels, chickens, fish— killed, gutted, scaled and plucked right in front of you. There was entire cow carcasses being manhandled and chopped up by a kid who looked 14.

A pig stall, where every part of the pig was waiting in trays, covered in flies. Pig heads being shaved…why? Women yielding gigantic cleavers, chopping up meat inches from their fingers. Noodles galore…you name it. Oh, and peaches. A palette of smells, sounds and colors.

China Part 3

noreply@blogger.com (prgvt) — Wed, 16 Aug 2006 02:42:00 +0000

Chris and I and a few others head out to the market after dinner. We discover cooked dog and donkey —all of the parts— for sale. The noodle man whacks and makes his noodles. After the others head back to the hotel, Chris and I venture down an alley and stumble into a pool hall. We laughingly try to play with sweaty hands and tiny cues (I notice later in the trip that players wear white cotton gloves so the cue slides easier). We are challenged by a local guy (who we see the next day on his motor scooter in the tourist market) and are promptly beaten, but not before he toys with us, missing shots on purpose. We head back to the market for a few beers and decide to patronize the guy who has been most diligent at hawking at us every night. We sit down at a table among all the other locals eating and drinking and the proprietor grabs us a couple of cold, tall ones and brings some winter melon as well. His wife comes over and hawks boiled soybeans and peanuts, we refuse —not in the program, but she still tosses a handful on our table for us to try. We want to try it all.

An older gentleman strolls over with an instrument in his hand and gives us a list of tunes, in Mandarin, to choose from. Of course we’re clueless and randomly pick 4 that are marked with either the + (plus) or a – (minus) Mandarin character. He beats on this dusty, cracked dulcimer thing with a thin mallet, click-clacks a rhythm with the other hand using 2 flat sticks. We discover that there are 2 categories of songs —those that cost 24 Yuan and those that cost 10. We choose one of the more expensive tunes and he begins to sing, belting out vocals past crooked teeth and spitting lips. I try to play the thing…everyone around us is captivated. More beers. The whole evening costs us $6 U.S.

China Part 2

noreply@blogger.com (prgvt) — Mon, 14 Aug 2006 21:20:00 +0000

So we eat lunch…can’t even begin to tell you what it was…they’re all blending in together…a tilt-a-whirl lazy Susan spin…head spinning. Are we tired of eating yet? I mean, there is a lot of food at each meal. When we’re active, it’s okay, but sitting in buses or in a class room…my belly growls. The lecture today was about Confucius. Pretty interesting history about this “teacher,” not philosopher.

After lunch, we go to his birthplace. He was born in a cave, ya know, and then brought back to Qufu by a tiger. So, we’ve seen photos of his birthplace and it looks serene, like where he should have been born. In the woods…secluded…special. We hop on a bus to drive 45 minutes out into the country, past people in the fields everywhere, through almost ghost towns; poor-looking villages with dirty, muddy streets and building supplies —bricks and such— all over. Goat-tenders and wheat dryers. Cyclists. Everyone stares at us, or maybe the huge bus we’re in. Each house we pass in these run-down villages has a beautiful tile mural inside the main entrance. But surrounding each house is stuff. Bricks, wood, corn drying on the roof, wheat schwag, bicycles. The road is randomly good, then bad, or non-existent. The corn in the fields we pass had been flattened by last night’s storm.

There’s only one way to get to the birthplace, and it’s obviously not visited by many. There didn’t seem to be much signage, but how would I know. We park the bus and scrambled down a road toward the birth site. There’s a hug crater with construction trailers on the edge. There’s a backhoe excavating a gigantic pit and Confucius’ cave sits, perched above the crater with the scar of the dig just a foot below the entrance. An artist’s rendition hangs near the crater. The Chinese government is revamping the site. I guess it is prone to flooding. Across the road from the crater is a ramshackle house. Chickens run around. Three ducks fight for the top of a melon. A little mangy dog gnaws on a dead bird. Up the hill is a canvas beekeeper’s tent.

Above the cave sits a temple at the top of a hill. Confucius taught his students iinside the walls...they love their walls and gates here. Unbelievably serene. The courtyards are filled with old cedars and stone walkways, covered in moss, lead us to tablets, more gates and houses. Bees buzz above and centipedes crawl below.